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About Those MLB Cutouts Share This on LinkedIn   Tweet This   Forward This

31 July 2020

We've long been plagued by a nephew who insists on rooting for his hometown Los Angeles Dodgers despite his affection for us, a life-long San Francisco (and retroactive New York) Giants fan. He's polite about it, a good sport even, but there are lines you can't cross.

Conversion. Dodger fan becomes Giant. Artist's conception.

So when we saw cardboard cutouts of nemeses like Tommy Lasorda behind home plate during the season opening series against those hotshot Dodgers a few days ago, we hatched a plan only an uncle could conceive.

We have a lot of adorable photos of our nephew, of course. So why not submit one to the Giants to be made into a cutout? After, that is, we Photoshopped his mug into an image of Giants gear.

REQUIREMENTS

So we looked up the photo requirements the Giants have published on their Photo Submission Guide.

The cutout itself is 18x30 inches. So the Giants recommend an image that is 2448 x 3264 pixels. Those are the exactly dimensions of our iPhone 6 Plus images, in fact. And everything else we shoot is higher resolution.

Not that quality much matters. If the cutout is visible during TV broadcast, it will barely be recognizable anyway.

PRICE

The problem, of course, is financing. Just exactly would such a stunt set back our gross domestic product?

Turns out the Giants charge $99 a cutout, much less than the Dodgers. No matter who you are.

Newsday's Jordan Lauterbach researched the rates for other clubs. They vary a lot:

  • The Dodgers, for example, want $149 for field level and $299 for Pavilion Home Run seats or Dugout seats behind home plate. So there's no danger of nephew retaliating anyway.
  • The New York Mets charge $86 with profits going to the Mets foundation. Season ticket holders who renew for 2021 can get one for free, though.
  • The Milwaukee Brewers want just $50.
  • The Atlanta Braves also want $50 but will take $25 from season ticket holders.
  • The Philadelphia Phillies will match that $25 for season ticket holders but only take $40 from the general pubic with profit benefiting their own charities.
  • The San Diego Padres have their own plans. They've put cutouts of members of the organization and their families behind home plate and plan to honor various groups for future games.
  • The Red Sox want $500 for a cutout on the Green Monster. But you get an autographed ball if your cutout "catches" a home run. Proceeds go to Covid-19 relief in Massachusetts.
  • The Oakland A's are taking $89 for one or $49 for Access members. There's a $149 option for the ALS CURE project foul ball zone which nets you a Stephen Piscotty autographed photo is your cutout catches a foul.
  • The Chicago White Sox only did this for the first home stand and took $49 for it.
  • The Tampa Bay Rays want $40 for season ticket holders and $60 from the rest.
  • The Kansas City Royals have a $40 flat fee for everybody.
  • The Seattle Mariners only want $30.
  • The Minnesota Twins are doing it for free but they won't put you in a seat. You'll be part of a mosaic on the left field home run porch.

MEMORABLE CUTOUTS

While pondering a GoFundMe page for our stunt, we did a little more research.

Sports Illustrated covered a number of inspiring cutouts in a piece by Jenna West.

  • A White Sox fan who bought multiple cutouts of himself
  • A ballpark wedding proposal (two cutouts there), which was accepted
  • A bunch of celebrities, especially in Los Angeles
  • Tom Hanks as a hot dog vender (with a recording of him hawking beer and hot dogs in the crowd noise clips)

Probably the most moving, though, was the Mets cutout honoring late photographer Anthony Causi from The New York Post with a cutout in his usual spot in the photo pit:

CONCLUSION

We've just solicited our nephew's wife and father-in-law, who are both huge Giant fans too, for financial assistance. If we hit our goal, we can avoid the GoFundMe approach (which might invite retaliation). If not, this hit piece will have to do.

It's the thought that counts, after all.

And we think the thought of a cutout of our nephew in Giants gear is pretty memorable in its own right. But only if you know -- and love -- him as we do.


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